A couple of nights ago, I had this urge to re-arrange my personal files and documents. I also re-arranged my cabinet, tidied up our bookshelves and started listing down the TO-DO’s that needs to be ticked off by the month of September.
It’s my way of purging the anxieties that have been building up inside me. Now that December is just around the corner. Anticipating the holidays, I suppose. And I am smiling more than usual now. And instead of moping, I pour all my energies to Sky and my work.
And lately, I have been forgetting myself again.
Sure, I look OKAY from the outside. But I feel that I need to have myself checked by a doctor one of these days. So I have peace of mind that my health is not deteriorating. Stress can do a lot of harm, and most of the time you can’t see it from the outside.
What I do notice lately is my penchant for sleeping VERY late at night. And then waking up TOO EARLY than I should. And when I do wake up, I felt like I didn’t sleep at all.
And I feel tired most of the time too. NOT GOOD.
I skipped two days from my weight training because of this. And the splitting headache that does not seem to go away. The headache wanes a bit sometimes, but most of the time I can feel my own mind PHYSICALLY punching my skull.
Hence, the sudden need of cleaning up and organizing things. Have to begin somewhere, somehow.
And I also notice lately that I have been subsisting on coffee, more coffee, a little of green tea and almost nothing else. I do really forget that I am hungry. And when I get the splitting headaches, that’s the only time I REALLY EAT.
Sometimes, I think of drinking loads of this:
Just to keep up with this:
But of course, I DON’T. 
The first few steps to a beginning is always the hardest.
P.S. Thank you for everyone that has been emailing and sending me words of encouragement in my Facebook. I have read through all, but find it hard to reply at the moment. I just want you all to know that I do READ them and cherish them! A big hug to all of you! You know who you are… 
